Welcome to the new year. There’s a lot of news going on right now that I really don’t care to respond to. Maybe Wax and his buddies will take up the late night thing over at ProfessionallyCatchy.com…I don’t think they’ve posted since Disney bought Marvel.
I’ve been doing almost NO drawing, and every time I sit down to continue particular written works I get really sluggish and start wondering if it’s worth continuing them. I’m not really here to beat myself up over that, though. I’m here to ask why.
A big part of the reason is self-confidence, I think, and an unreasonable expectation to draft a work that needs no editing. What I REALLY need to get over is this: as a self described jack-of-all-trades, nothing I produce is going to be dazzling without a hell of a lot of sweat.
As I admit I’m no master at anything in particular, I have to admit that no master stroke will fall onto the canvas, whether my palette is words and paragraphs, digital ink, layout, graphic design, etc.
I’m not really a master at any particular media skillset, old or new. I’m more of a…media survivalist, maybe? Finding out enough to know how to complete the task and finding out enough to know how that task fits into the whole process.
And yet…you’re not making anything! All this crap about not being a “master” is all fine and well, but it’s sure as hell not an excuse for sitting in front of a blank screen.
The excuse comes in telling myself–right before I’m about to draw or write–that whatever I’m about to draw or write is not going to meet my expectations. Then I sit for a while, ponder that thought, close the window and watch TV or click blindly through news that pisses me off again.
Well, master-of-none, that’s bullshit. You use twitter despite the fact that you aren’t the MOST clever. You design a magazine knowing you’re wicked far from being the BEST at it. You code webpages with sparse knowledge (and any web-design student’s expertise would blow you out of the water), but that doesn’t bug you a bit.
So tell me, Mr. Crybaby Hack, why would it be any different with writing or drawing?
I suppose that’s right. It shouldn’t be any different. I do things like tweet and design and code because I like doing and learning about those things, not because I’m trying to be the best at them.
Calling oneself a “jack-of-all-trades” pretty much infers that you’ve given up the die-hard quest to be the BEST at one thing in a trade for knowledge in all things.
And if I might call you a hypocrite for a moment–I’d like to remind you how proud you are of your non-traditional education, and that you consistently recite the source of your knowledge as “anyone with more expertise than myself.” This means, in contrast to your attitude as of late, that you’re paying lip service to those who improve you while moping about because you perceive those same people to be more skilled than you.
Well, they are. Stop singing their praises while simultaneously acting like a brat. Learn from them–like you always say you do.
Stop moping, jackass! CREATE! It’s the only f—ing thing that has ever, ever made you happy. And no moping about wasting time from having been a jackass, either. Now get to work!
I guess this serves as proof that my brutal honesty doesn’t even end at myself.